I’m 32 weeks pregnant today! Only about a month and a half to go (yikes) to welcome Baby #3! Some people say it takes a village, some people say it takes a grandma, or a few nannies and babysitters to help you raise your children. Right now it’s just Jose and I ready to take on and be outnumbered by our new addition. It’s becoming increasingly difficult to balance the flow around here as my belly is getting bigger, I am more tired and there is so much going on! As you recall, our babysitter Isabella had to leave us for an amazing internship in France, so we have another sitter or as I like to say, “mother’s helper” to help me hold down the fort while Jose is at work Monday through Friday. Yesenia is working out great and I hope she doesn’t become frightened once the third boy joins the craziness. But there is nothing like Daddy’s hands. Jose and I tag team, have a harmonious flow, love schedules, and together we are organized. He is a true hands-on daddy. I feel a little guilty (just a little) that he does more than his share on the weekend.
I have two former students that I keep in touch with through Facebook. They both became young fathers a few years ago and they are still in their early twenties. They both have little girls and they are close to Diego’s age! I know that they are not with the mothers of the girls and I see through their status updates and pictures that they are very involved in their little girl’s lives. Both seem like really good dads. I like to think that my two students know that when they find a partner (one of them jokes that he wants a woman to cook and clean and later grab a beer with him to watch a basketball game) if they know how to balance each other, he will find a basketball-loving girl (or one that will sit with him while the game is on) that may or may not cook and clean but one that will know to appreciate him. Diego sees Jose unload the dishwasher, cook (well on the grill really), change diapers and help with their bath. Diego also sees a much calmer, happier and a very relaxed mom when dad is home.
The bottom line is: I appreciate and am grateful for all that Jose does. He teaches, he encourages and he keeps me sane! And I know that Jose appreciates the work I do Monday through Friday and understands the nature of having to “rescue” me so I can re-charge and do it all over again. There is no way I’ll say no to him when he asks me to sit in the backyard with him while he starts a fire in his new outdoor fire place (while smoke fills my hair and I watch him with envy pour a glass of wine for himself) and he deserves me to listen to his March Madness updates (last time I watched any basketball Michael Jordan was still playing) and watch football, baseball, even boxing (!) with him. We’re a team with our boys and in our marriage. We both know our job is to parent and we give each other the respect we deserve to still be a little bit of the old us. We don’t have grandmas around and we don’t have a village but we have each other and I couldn’t ask for a better partner.
I hope you have a partner AND loads of babysitters to help out too!