Books, For YOU, Kids, Life

Parenting 101

May 18, 2012

Yes, I own all these books shown above. I have friends who own more and I have friends who don’t own any at all. It’s all quite alright, I read anything that comes my way and I don’t mind that all these books have a different philosophy regarding parenting.

Oh parenting. It’s been on the news so much these past few weeks, everything from the tanorexic mom to the diapering mom to the Time Magazine cover mom, even a new movie about parenting coming out this weekend! And the critics that we become…it’s always easier to judge how “bad” some parents are and how the rest of us try our “best”.

I’m not a fan of attachment parenting, authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, Tiger-mom parenting…I welcome the knowledge I receive from all of the different styles but eventually it comes down to common sense parenting for me.

I’m noticing that as much as we like to think that Jose and I are raising all our children the same, it’s quite impossible. Santi has a big brother and a little brother but Diego was an only child for four years, doesn’t have an older brother and has two little brothers. The family dynamics, the city we live in, the time I now have for each one of them, it’s so hard for me to stick to one way of raising my boys. Jose and I are parenting differently than we did five years ago, we still listen to our doctors (we’re on our fourth pediatrician), read parenting books and articles, talk to our friends, listen to our mothers…so much influence right?

It makes more sense to use common sense, see what works for each family, not to be intimated by anyone regarding your child rearing. In the end, YOU and your family have to be happy. It doesn’t hurt to look up, “how long should my newborn be sleeping?” in one of the reference baby books, but if sleeping with your baby (as one book might suggest) makes you uncomfortable, don’t do it! Knowledge is key but your instincts are priceless.

Good luck to all my new mommy friends! Click on any of the books above (they are good) to order and read up!
Experienced mommies, did you stock up on reading material before your first born? Second or third baby?

Have a great weekend!

Your friend,

Betty

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9 Comments

  • Reply Sleeping Mom @ Sleeping Should Be Easy May 18, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    I totally ate up all those parenting books too haha. I only have one kid, but even in the course of 2 1/2 years I’ve already fine-tuned and changed up my parenting here and there. I think it’s good to have a general idea and even academic knowledge of parenting but in the end, considering how different all kids are, what works for one may not work for another.

    I always tell myself that if I ever have another kid, I would do XY and Z differently based on baby #1. But who’s to say that baby #2 would take to it either? And maybe baby #1 really did need all that.

    I’ll be curious to see looking back 30 years from now to see how much I’ve learned and changed throughout all this time ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Betty
      Reply Betty May 20, 2012 at 10:57 am

      Hi! I’m learning so much from just watching Baby #3’s needs! And he is only 11 days old! I also think that #1 and #2’s needs affect what we decide to do for #3. I really hope we just do a good job! haha

  • Reply Isabella Veronesi May 21, 2012 at 5:32 am

    Hi Betty,

    This rings true for me in every aspect in life in that we cannot really predict or control anything but our intention to show love and guidance to those who are closest to us.

    My cousin Pascal, 29, is a first time mother, and when I met up with her in these last months in France, I found what she told me to be similar to what you are saying. She told me the story of a time when her baby (Gabriel) was crying, and as she picked him up to comfort him, when another mother told her not to do it because she read that this will make him feel ‘needy’ for his mother’s attention all the time. Pascal told me that as much as she appreciated the knowledge shared by the other mother, she also felt that she did not agree. Her reason being that she wanted her son to know that when he is in pain, she is there to help him so that he does not feel alone. I see this as you put it, ‘it makes more sense to use common sense’.

    I know that all mothers want to raise their children the ‘right’ way, but I think the ‘right’ way is different in every context depending on: culture, faith, family, and mother

    because,

    “it makes more sense to use common sense” ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Reply Isabella Veronesi May 21, 2012 at 5:39 am

      That being said, when I am a mother I will buy the whole bookstore, fearing everything. ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • Betty
        Reply Betty May 21, 2012 at 2:21 pm

        Thanks for your thoughts Isabella! And I agree that so much more plays into how you raise your child ie; culture and faith. I know you will be a fantastic mother some day too!!! xoxo

  • Reply aida May 21, 2012 at 7:55 pm

    hi prima… funny i have most of those books as well.. and i have quite a few children haha..but still feel the need to ask other moms or read on it..so much changes within a few years its hard to keep up with whats right whats good whats not…and i always say every child is different but as long as the basics of nurture, love, values are shown i think and hope are kids turn out fine.. look at us..we ended up quite alright and im sure our parents did not have books or the web. mucho amor sent your way for you and the familia.. ps. i love your blogs

    • Betty
      Reply Betty May 21, 2012 at 9:27 pm

      Welcome Aida!!!!! So glad you are commenting! You are right about our parents and I often think the same thing. How did our parents do it??? Instinct I bet or family advice. Simple huh?? Please come back soon!! xoxo

  • Reply Nancy May 22, 2012 at 12:34 am

    I agree with all of you, common sense is the way to go, and also learn from experience. I did not read many books as you already know I don’t read much, my mom was a big help when I had my new bornes, and as the girls grow up I try to invest time on the things i remember I needed the most as a child. Betty you are doing an amazing job. !! I hope you come visit soon.

  • Reply Royal Baby July 22, 2013 at 6:13 pm

    […] advice would you give to Kate? I wonder if she took Parenting 101? […]

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